Missing My Parents

Jack and Fanny Kaufman  June 1952

  Less than ten months ago, both my parents were still alive on earth.  At 93 and 90, respectively, I figured they were pretty strong and would be with us a few more years.  But God had other plans.

I remember a friend telling me about her season of caring for aging parents, about driving them here and there, about their living in her home, and her being their primary caretaker.  While home schooling her children, helping her husband's business, and caring for parents, she felt her life was so full she couldn't see the end of it. 
It was non-stop pressure for her, and she felt the weight of it keenly.  But as I was sharing with her about my duties of running about taking care of my parents, and my children and my fatigue, she quietly and solemnly spoke these words: "You wake up one day, and they're gone.  All of a sudden, it's over."

Very true.  While in the midst of the sound and fury, signifying all the world at the moment, you open your eyes, you receive that call, you open the door, and those dear ones over whom you labored and wept are gone. 

Then come the wandering days: you wonder as you wander about, unable to focus on the new normal.  You begin thinking about the "never agains:" never again will you hear their greeting, their peculiar phrases, their words of wisdom.  Never again will you receive the gaze of a parent to his beloved child.  And gone are the shared moments that you cannot have with anyone else in the world.
No one else understands that press of the hand, the personal joke, the history behind the little bits of childhood verse.  Tears flow, and wisdom dictates to let them come.  They clean the heart, and melt away the inhuman in us.

The memories start knocking at the doors to our souls, and, if we're wise, we let them in, and allow them to dwell with us, and establish rooms with us.  They're quiet, those "memory-tenants."  They don't ask for much, but they do pour out much balm and offer kind words amid the tears.  They bring a kind of comfort in the night: to have known, to have loved, to have been loved.

I miss my parents.  They were good parents, and I am grateful for them.  They gave many lasting  gifts to their family.  I hope that the good legacy they unwittingly passed down to us will be filtered through the sands of time and show up in future generations. With 3 children and 9 grandchildren, perhaps some of the truth, goodness and beauty of their lives will have an influence, and color future peoples with their particular shades and hues.

 Au revoir Pa  (August 23, 1925 - November 29, 2018)
 Au revoir Ma    (May 5, 1928 - September 19, 2019)

Your children love you and miss you.   And we certainly won't forget you.  No : "A coup de petoche, I have a record garage" will live on... And so shall "Alors Ma!"

Christmas 2018

Wow! Christmas, already!

Every year it is the same: the months roll along, filled with all manner of activity, and suddenly, Christmas is upon us.

Blessed Christmas to all!

Too busy living to post about it!

by Mama H.

Forgive the silence.... but as the title states, we are indeed too busy living, to write about life in the family.

Birthdays have come and gone, and lots of growing up has occurred, by adults as well as by children.

So many events, that are indeed traceable by photo or narration, have been experienced, but the most significant are the ones that receive no fanfare, no shutters clicking, no breathless explanation of conversations or happenings.  They are the quiet, under-cover currents of understanding, revelation, and workings-out of wisdom, tears and wrestlings, lonely walks marveling at the birds' calls, sprouting flowers in the garden, and the "Ah-ha!" moments in following arguments in a book.

God is not silent in all these things.  In fact, His megaphone of pain, quietness, loneliness, misunderstanding, and suffering of many kinds is a welcome gift to answer the delirious busyness and distraction that we all face and are tempted to face at any moment.  These draw our attention back to where they will bring us the greatest profit: to His face, His Word, to His presence.

So, God is at work in the Hellwig family.  Many good things, many we would call bad, painful, sorrowful, even heartbreaking.  But, He, in His mysterious way, turns things on their heads and brings good.  No presumptions, here, but we know Whom we have believed, and are persuaded that He is able to keep that which we've committed to Him against that day....that day, when all will be made right again.

It is in the struggle that we grow.  We labor that we might give birth to blessing.  May we not be afraid of the hard work.

In short, we Hellwigs are in the struggle, but hanging together as much as we can and as much as He wills for us for now.

Briefs:
Timothy is back from FL, visiting us for a month, and we are so happy to spend time with him.  What a sweetheart.

Christianna continues singing, teaching violin, and planning for future studies.

We get to see Arianne and Brian sometimes...and when we do, Benaiah is quick to pounce on them!

Benaiah is still up to his usual creativity...

                                     Porg, 3 ways...paper/cardboard, Perler bead and origami

The rest of us continue along...no pictures, but the quiet work of God, transforming us all.

Deer in our yard

Oliver and I will be celebrating 30 years of marriage this fall.  In the words of some not-so-great poet at some point in time:
"Ah, how swiftly doth fly the years, 'tis but an instant hence since we bade each our "I do's" The swollen buds doth burst with life and God worketh as He may choose"

(As I said, not-so-great poetry...it abounds around here.) 

But God's blessings most certainly do abound...every day!  So grateful for all He is!

A Black Belt

What a happy time when milestones are reached!

We rejoice with Elliot over achieving a black belt in Tae Kwon Do in December.

He worked hard for 3 years, diligently completing each level, and overcoming the obstacles that came at him, trusting God to allow him to complete what he began.  The Lord is the rewarder of those who diligently seek Him and trust Him.

                                                                                                               

                              Great work, Elliot!  We are so proud of you!

Wordless Wednesday: Lego Garden

Posted by Tobias

The Annual Photos

post by Mama H.

What is the end of the year without the annual family pictures?  ("More relaxing!" chime in more than one family member, no doubt!)

The very last picture taken, under protest and amid many sighs and complaints, was the one that made the cut!
A very special one indeed, as our last family photo before Arianne marries her best friend Brian, on December 18th.

Amid all the preparations, it is good to remember the kindnesses of God in having brought us this far.  He will never desert us, or forsake us.  His mercies flow in every morning, noon and night, and His perfection make us hope and long for the day when all wrongs will be made right, when all the tears will be wiped away, and He is acknowledged by all as King of kings and Lord of lords.

We're not too sure we'll be posting again this year, with a wedding in 2 weeks.... but, then again, one never knows!

A Glorious Mess

post by Mama H.

A few of many of Benaiah's paper projects!

The old saying "where there's smoke, there's progress" holds true here, only I might amend the saying to "Where there's paper scraps, there's Benaiah.... working on some more paper models!"

  And this is just a small portion of the work area!

More  paper... and the blocks to build a forest.

Allied tanks, a jeep, and a bulldozer for earthworks.

A very happy creator....

Some of the bulwarks  ....

This tank operator seems to be asleep on the job!









And then, we mustn't forget his ships:

The Green Hawk

and the Great Osprey,
complete with....

Great Osprey

.... 'tween decks ....

4 levels....

ladders  from deck to deck

 and the Smoke Pipe:

Smoke Pipe with ladder...

and a car carrier option....

Zadok's house :

Home Sweet Home

Zzzzz  zzzzz zzzzzadok!

Sweet dreams, Zadok!

Snowfoot's home, complete with bed, piano, tv, and laptops!

There's also a sink, shower and a tea kettle!  Very safe with a deadbolt-door!

A submarine

The Sayna, with a tricky trap door, and a motley crew

 We have a very busy young man. 

Pi Day 2016

While not as dramatic last year's Pi-day, this year's was not to be missed!

Thank you, Christianna, for a beautiful Pi, er.. pie!

(Pi is ever beautiful, one of God's amazing numbers!)

And, here in our home, we believe whipped cream is one of God's amazing gifts, too!  Yum!

A Few Books for 2016

Every January, I choose an array of new books to read in the coming year.  Sometimes, I get through all of them, plus a couple dozen others.  Other years, I read only one or two from my list, plus several dozen others.  Last year, I only read one of the books on my list, but I went through so many others.  Many of these I outlined and took notes from, and several I have even used to apply to my life, to effect change.  A few were to provoke thought.  Some, were simply a good story.  There's a place for each of those.  Not every book has to be practically applicable in order to benefit.

Of course, the Book of books remains my top read every year.  And every year, it precipitates the greatest change!  Zephaniah, Matthew, Colossians, Ezekiel.... all leading me upward, to Him Who inhabits its pages.

My list for this year?

A Praying Life by Paul E. Miller

The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller

Onward by Russell Moore

Fierce Convictions by Karen Swallow Prior

The Art of Work by Jeff Goins

Lit!  by Tony Reinke

Your God is Too Safe by Mark Buchanan

Heaven by Randy Alcorn

Paradise Lost by John Milton

The Pilgrims Regress by C. S. Lewis

The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg

and

Through Many Dangers, The Story of John Newton  by Brian Edwards

A bit of this, and some of that.  I'm sure I'll be throwing in a book on the philosophy of teaching, and perhaps some historical fiction, plenty of  history and  more biography. And I still need to finish A Tale of Two Cities, which I started but didn't finish, along with a few others that suffered the same fate.

What are you reading in 2016?  What did you read in 2015?  What did you like, love, hate?  And why? What would you recommend?  What made you think?  Laugh?  Weep?
I'd love to hear from you.

An Athletic Saturday

by Lisa H.

What do a 10-mile trail race and a CrossFit Festivus Games competition have in common?

For the Hellwigs, they happened on the same day!

 



Elliot participated in a CrossFit Festivus Game challenge in October, spending the whole day at the gym.    He seemed to fly through Burpees... and lunges and sit-ups. 

 
Oliver, earlier that morning,  ran a 10-mile trail race:

Go!

Keep running!

 

 

 

 

 

Finished in great time!  Faster than expected!

A 10 mile race for one of us, and one who worked hard in the Festivus;
A day of athletics for two of us, with lots of cheering from the rest of us.
(Rhyme originally unintended... but I just HAD to finish it! )

Good work, Hellwig men!